distractions

is for DISTRACTIONS

"Your distractions will distract from your message."

-Linnaea Mallette

Words only count for 7% of your message. The rest is conveyed by YOU. Convey confidence and power by watching for and eliminating distracting, nervous habits.

Through the many years of being a Toastmaster I have seen many types of distracting habits. They include:

Playing with keys or change in a coat or pant pocket

Fiddling with a pen, pencil or the gavel

Playing with one’s hair

Scratching one’s arms, head or face

Fiddling with jewelry – earrings, bracelets, necklaces, etc.

Fiddling with a tie

Playing with a belt

Playing with glasses

Nervous habits are power leaks. After a while, the audience becomes so aware of the repeated habit that they are no longer listening to the speaker. However, the audience IS receiving a message - that this speaker lacks poise, power and confidence.

Videotape yourself to identify distracting habits. If you find that you fiddle with things, then do what you can to remove the temptation(s) until the habit falls away (although removing your hair might be a problem!) Remove change and keys from you pocket. Wear minimum, if no, jewelry. Button your coat to keep the tie out of reach. Ask someone you trust to watch for your nervous habits and somehow signal such to you from the audience. A simple reminder that you are scratching your arm can make you aware enough to refrain from repeating it the rest of your speech.

I love the following story from Berk Decker's book, You've Got to be Belived to be Heard about Norman Vincent Peale's appreciation of video to spot unsightly habits.

"I used to do this with my nose" (as he put his right finger astride his right nostril), "not picking my nose, just sort of rubbing it. But it looked like I was picking my nose and I have cut that out. If my finger goes up in that direction I immediately take it down. I stopped a lot of nervous affectations that I didn't know I had, even after years of speaking. Yes, video feedback has defintely helped me."

Watch excerpts of Dr. Peale. See any distractions?

QUAYLE DISTRACTIONS

When Dan Quayle was vice-president of the United States, he appeared as a guest on the Larry King Live show. Since Mr. Quayle was so big on family values, a caller asked why he was not wearing his wedding ring. Quayle explained that because he tended to fiddle with his ring, his advisors suggested he not wear it while being interviewed on television.